The world’s greatest monolgue

And there I am in Sri lanka, formerly Ceylon, at 3 am, looking for brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, or Ozzy wouldn’t go on stage that night. Jeff Beck pops his head round the door and mentions there’s a little sweet shop on the edge of town. We go, and it’s closed. There’s me and Keith Moon and David Crosby breaking into this little sweet shop, right? Instead of a guard dog, they’ve got this bloody great big Bengal tiger. I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, but the shop owner and his son, that’s a different story altogether….I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. Nasty business, really, but sure enough, I got the M&Ms, and Ozzy went on stage and did a great show.

by Mark Grealish

Dashing brigand, handsome rapscallion, father, crazy cat lady and the world's greatest lover and liar, living in Dublin, Ireland.

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